{"id":8297,"date":"2011-08-18T22:10:41","date_gmt":"2011-08-19T02:10:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/?p=8297"},"modified":"2012-12-26T20:08:03","modified_gmt":"2012-12-27T01:08:03","slug":"is-the-summer-of-2011-the-worst-ever","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/cultural-correspondent\/08\/18\/is-the-summer-of-2011-the-worst-ever\/","title":{"rendered":"Is The Summer Of 2011 The Worst Ever?"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Rupert Murdoch was pied in the face. TBS canceled the late-night show of alleged comedian George Lopez. And a <a href=\"http:\/\/www.pbh2.com\/pets-animals\/mariachi-serenades-a-beluga-whale\/\">Mexican mariachi band serenaded a beluga whale<\/a> in Connecticut.<\/p>\n<p><center><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"640\" height=\"510\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/ZS_6-IwMPjM?rel=0\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/center><\/p>\n<p>That was it. Media schadenfreude and a gyrating marine mammal: the lone highlights of the Summer of 2011. It wasn\u2019t supposed to be this way. The Summer of 2010 should have been rock bottom.  Three interminable months of the Greek contagion, the BP Gulf Leak, and an Icelandic volcano no one could pronounce.<\/p>\n<p>Sports fans endured breathlessly hyped months of LeBronian ego. Saintly boyfriends, Sex &#038; The City 2. And fratty roommates everywhere, the <a href=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/anonymous_banker\/06\/03\/bros-icing-bros-the-real-story\/\">Smirnoff Ice Bros Icing Bros meme<\/a>.<\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>I lived in fear then. The left pocket of my favorite pair of jeans is still molded to the shape of a Smirnoff bottle. Security guards frisked me while leaving Duane Reade or Chipotle until they saw the suspicious bulge was a lukewarm bottle of malt-liquor and realized not even shop-lifters would stoop so low. But at the end of the day all this was bearable. We had the World Cup.<\/p>\n<p>Sex &#038; The City 2 bombed. Bros Icing Bros mercifully fizzled out. And LeBron met his comeuppances at the hands of Dallas\u2019 stingy zone defense. Yet this is of little consolation. Because the Summer of 2011 is far, far worse. It is the worst summer of our lives.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/progressive-economics\/08\/14\/rioters-versus-bankers\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Rioters vs Bankers Political Comic\" src=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/rioters-vs-bankers.jpg\" title=\"Rioters Versus Bankers\" class=\"aligncenter\" width=\"636\" height=\"442\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Uprisings and discontent tweets, Facebook updates, and Skypes its way across the globe. Unemployment, food prices, and\/or Middle Eastern strongmen, the clarion call to this 21st Century global revolt. Riots and looting gut capitals from Jerusalem to London. Baseball bat sales surged 6500% on Amazon&#8217;s United Kingdom site.<\/p>\n<p>Alas, Arab Spring wilted into a Summer of stalemate. Tahrir Square swarms again with protesters protesting this isn\u2019t what they protested for. Syria cracks down, Muammar Gaddafi digs in. And Iran\u2019s centrifuges spin on&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" alt=\"Cartman at Egypt Protests\"\" src=\" http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/02\/cartman-at-egypt-protests.jpg\" title=\"Cartman at Egypt Protests\" class=\"aligncenter\" width=\"483\" height=\"275\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Stateside, the Summer of 2011 is The Summer of Lockout. From district courts to the hard-court, it\u2019s been an endless Summer of hot, broke, and deadlocked; of filibusters, walk-outs, and stonewalling. A bitter Summer of record high gold prices ($1,800+\/ounce) and record low Congressional approval ratings (12%). A Summer when \u201ccompromise\u201d became a four letter word.<\/p>\n<p>Bruce Springsteen will not pen a song about this one. It is the Summer of 9.1% unemployment. The Summer when Apple had more cash on hand than the U.S. government. And perhaps most tragically of all, the Summer of a Transformers movie\u2014sans Megan Fox.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/megan-fox-transformers.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"megan-fox-transformers\" width=\"305\" height=\"300\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-8302\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/megan-fox-transformers.jpg 305w, https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/megan-fox-transformers-200x196.jpg 200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 305px) 100vw, 305px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>Legally, t\u2019was a Summer no one got what they deserved. The Supreme Court sided with Wal-Mart. Casey Anthony, Roger Clemens, and Dominic Strauss Kahn\u2014a butcher, a faker, and an IMF banker\u2014 all convicted only in the court of public opinion.<\/p>\n<p>True, New York finally granted gays the right to marry. But not Sesame Street. The children\u2019s program kiboshed an <a href=\"http:\/\/www.change.org\/petitions\/let-bert-ernie-get-married-on-sesame-street\">online petition for the ambiguous Bert and Ernie duo to wed<\/a>, arguing they \u201cdo not have a sexual orientation.\u201d Bert and Ernie were unavailable to comment, possibly because they are puppets.<\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/us-heat-wave-summer-2011.jpg\" alt=\"2011 United States Heat Wave\" title=\"us-heat-wave-summer-2011\" width=\"324\" height=\"300\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-8301\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/us-heat-wave-summer-2011.jpg 324w, https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/us-heat-wave-summer-2011-200x185.jpg 200w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 324px) 100vw, 324px\" \/><\/p>\n<p>And there was the heat. La Ni\u00f1a\u2014the less famous, cold-watered sibling to El Ni\u00f1o\u2014cooled off the Pacific, shut off the moisture pipeline, and desiccated the U.S. in the worst drought since the Dust Bowl. Texas governor Rick Perry declared a state-wide three day prayer for rain. There wasn\u2019t the slightest drizzle for a week. Perry hosted a prayer rally after the S&#038;P downgraded the U.S. The Dow plunged 5.5% the next day.<\/p>\n<p>Small wonder <a href=\"http:\/\/religion.blogs.cnn.com\/2011\/07\/27\/poll-52-percent-approve-of-gods-job-performance\/\">God\u2019s approval ratings plummeted to 52%<\/a> in a Public Policy Polling survey. Younger respondents docked the Heavenly Father for his handling of natural disasters. 71% of respondents approved of God\u2019s creation of the Universe. And 100% of respondents are believed to have asked why Public Policy Polling bothered with the study.<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.theonion.com\/articles\/god-hinting-at-retirement,17747\/\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/god-hints-at-retirement.jpg\" alt=\"\" title=\"god-hints-at-retirement\" width=\"608\" height=\"399\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-8300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/god-hints-at-retirement.jpg 608w, https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/god-hints-at-retirement-200x131.jpg 200w, https:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/god-hints-at-retirement-600x393.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 608px) 100vw, 608px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>The sports gods must be bored. They must be entertained by the whims of Philly\u2019s barbarian sports fans. Deus Ex Machina is the only explanation why the trashiest sports city now hosts an athletic Golden Age.<\/p>\n<p>The fans don\u2019t deserve this. They\u2019ve pelted opposing players with D-cell batteries, cheered when they hurt. They\u2019ve even booed Santa Claus. They should be cursed with years of cellar-dwelling. Years of perennial rebuilding in creaky, run-down stadiums. Not hoisting divisional titles before sell-out crowds in sparkling Citizens Bank Park.<\/p>\n<p>The fans don\u2019t deserve Roy Halladay. They don\u2019t deserve Nnamdi Asomugha. And they especially don\u2019t deserve a masterful front office that has fleeced the league.<\/p>\n<p>The Phillies front office mustered an arms race\u2014Roy Halladay, Cliff Lee, Cole Hamels, Roy Oswalt\u2014the likes of which the game has never seen before. The Eagles\u2019 front office assembled an arguable Dream Team after scooping up the cr\u00e8me de la cr\u00e8me from a lock-out shortened free agency. The Phillies coast with the best record in the majors. The Eagles envision Super Bowl or Bust in preseason. And the gods await another tribute celebration from the savage fans&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><center><iframe loading=\"lazy\" width=\"640\" height=\"390\" src=\"http:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/CCJwh3AgIeY?rel=0\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen><\/iframe><\/center><\/p>\n<p><center><\/p>\n<hr width=\"80%\"><\/center><\/p>\n<p>This is the third of a 3 part series on the Summer of 2011. See the other parts here: <a href=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/anonymous_banker\/08\/23\/why-obama-is-the-big-loser-of-the-summer\/\">Why Obama Is The Big Loser Of The Summer<\/a> and <a href=\"http:\/\/www.prosebeforehos.com\/anonymous_banker\/08\/26\/the-heroes-and-zeros-of-summer-2011\/\">The Heroes And Zeros Of Summer 2011<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Rupert Murdoch was pied in the face. TBS canceled the late-night show of alleged comedian George Lopez. And a Mexican mariachi band serenaded a beluga whale in Connecticut. That was it. Media schadenfreude and a gyrating marine mammal: the lone highlights of the Summer of 2011. It wasn\u2019t supposed to be this way. The Summer [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":549,"featured_media":10518,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[259],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v21.7 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Is The Summer Of 2011 The Worst Ever? - Prose Before Hos<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Rupert Murdoch was pied in the face. TBS canceled the late-night show of alleged comedian George Lopez. 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