World’s Worst: “Bill O’Reilly has left the human race”

Bill O’Reilly (aka Dogma Robot), has officially left the human race.

O’Reilly to viewer: “Your so-called compassion helped kill those children” in Bronx fire:

On the March 9 edition of Fox News’ The O’Reilly Factor, host Bill O’Reilly responded to an email from a viewer complaining about his statement the previous day that the victims of a March 7 fire in the Bronx in which one adult and eight children were killed “may be illegal aliens” by stating: “Your so-called compassion helped kill those kids.” He later added: “It’s people like you, [viewer], who promote that kind of chaos in the name of compassion, who look the other way while poor workers and children are exploited by greedy landlords and businesses because you don’t like the immigration laws.”

Later in the program, Fox News host Geraldo Rivera chastised O’Reilly, claiming that “to make the connection between illegal immigration and that horrific fire in the Bronx two days ago is an injustice to the victims of that fire.”

On both March 8 and March 9, O’Reilly complained that New York City policies regarding illegal immigrants made it impossible to determine if the fire victims were illegal immigrants because New York “is a sanctuary city.” According to a March 2004 Congressional Research Service report titled “Enforcing Immigration Law: The Role of State and Local Law Enforcement,” which lists New York among “[c]ities and counties currently that have sanctuary policies,” “Most cities that are considered sanctuary cities have adopted a ‘don’t ask-don’t tell’ policy where they don’t require their employees, including law enforcement officers, to report to federal officials aliens who may be illegally present in the country.”

As Sexy As You Can Imagine

Because nothing much else needs to be said about the Zionist S&M Gimp (Courtesy of the BBC):

Israel has recalled its ambassador to El Salvador after he was found drunk and naked apart from bondage gear.

Reports say he was able to identify himself to police only after a rubber ball had been removed from his mouth….

Haaretz website reports that police found Mr Refael in the Israeli embassy compound where he had been found bound, gagged and naked apart from sado-masochistic sex accessories.

Daily Sign of the Apocalypse

Lisa de Moraes writes in today’s Washington Post about the most recent sign that a) network TV is a few feet further into the grave than Hollywood movies b) creativity has resorted to plagiarism c) Jesus will be flying down to Los Angeles in a hovercraft with Buddha to personally punish anyone involved in this project.

What is this project? Oh, just the fact that ABC has picked up a pilot based on the Geico commercial that features three Cavemen who are picked on by society at large for being cavemen. The basis of the sitcom is that:

the three cavemen live in the suburbs of modern-day Atlanta (which perhaps the network feels is closer to the Paleolithic era than, say, Manhattan). There, they suffer from the prejudice of others, in much the same way they have since Geico first claimed in its ads that its Web site is so easy to use “even a caveman can do it.”

…The idea of a “Cavemen” sitcom is not unlike the scathing social satire ABC aired from spring ’91 to summer ’94. “Dinosaurs” starred gigantic puppetlike reptiles and included an episode in which a dinosaur about to join the Young Males Carnivore Association (YMCA) decides to become a herbivore, for which he’s called a “herbo” and booted for going against the laws of nature.

Yes, broadcast networks used to be able to get away with stuff like that. And dared to….

The ABC TV Studio spokeswoman said she’d never had so many e-mails from the general public about a project, including some who think they are naturals for the roles because of their physical resemblance to, um, cavemen. One guy wrote in saying he had a series of caves under his house and invited the network to shoot the series there.

Misunderstood

At some point, we all have our sexuality questioned. In my case it was by two married gay men. I had expected a simple night out at the bar where a (female) friend of mine invited me to keep her company. She tended the bar while I drank the free beer she offered me. It was a good arrangement and needed no adjustment.

I had noticed earlier that there happened to be a gay couple sitting next to me. This did not concern me in the slightest bit as I don’t really care about peoples choice of sexuality. Before I know it, my friend (who I now think set me up) introduced me to the regular customers sitting next to me. I went through with the formalities, returned to my beer and vague flirting with the girl.

Since I am a smoker, I wandered outside for my 5 minutes of ‘fresh air’. It was a mistake as I was ambushed by the two queers.

“Hey, you got a smoke for me and my husband?” he asked. I obliged and even offered a light. That was the last of the niceties. “You want to come in the car with us? We have a little bit of blow.” Now, I’ve never done it and didn’t intend to with two gay guys under any circumstance. I don’t think they heard me saying no.

“You should come back to the house with us, we live around the block from here.” he went on “It will be fun, we have wine and other fun stuff. Come with us.” Again I protested and at this point, I’m making my way back to the safety of the bar. “Well, have you ever been with a boy” he prodded. I had enough and turned around and headed back to the bar.

“Atleast show us your PENIS!” they yelled. I returned expletives, explicit hand gestures and derogatory comments at the duo. Upon returning to my stool, I picked up and moved to the other end of the bar. My friend immediately saw the look on my face and exclaimed, “You poor thing, what did they do to you?”

I shook my head and ordered up a shot.

Who’s going to pay my monthly rape bill?

Courtesy of Girl Farts (which I can only assume is a site run by an Asian man whose fetish is to stick his nose into a women’s buttcrack after a hearty meal of barbecue and semen), it’s been reported that “rape victims in Missouri are billed for their rape kits“. Now, you see, some people may misconstrue this as some horrible measure in a podunk, antiquated state. But in reality, this is a continuation of the Thomas Jefferson business policies (TJ biz-nass for all you ebonics linguists), for it is the secret clause in the US Constitution that reads “Thou shalt do ladies against thy will, and when thee pregnancy emerges, they shalt be the one to pay for it. When thy is confronted with said charges, please ignorance, heavily and mightily, and when unsurmountable evidence falls out of your favor, publicly state “She asked for it”. Thus, thou shalt be ridden of thy burden”. America people, learn to love it.