Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice, attack the moon

You know who else needs a good sense of humor? The city of Boston. Fuck! You blew it. You got fooled by cartoon characters with their middle fingers up. Bruce Schneier, a security expert, has an excellent post entitled “Non-Terrorist Embarrassment in Boston”, that pretty much sums up mine and a lot of other people’s feelings about the matter:

The story is almost too funny to write about seriously. To advertise the Cartoon Network show “Aqua Teen Hunger Force,” the network put up 38 blinking signs (kind of like Lite Brites) around the Boston area. The Boston police decided — with absolutely no supporting evidence — that these were bombs and shut down parts of the city.

Now the police look stupid, but they’re trying really not hard not to act humiliated:

Governor Deval Patrick told the Associated Press: “It’s a hoax — and it’s not funny.”

Unfortunately, it is funny. What isn’t funny is now the Boston government is trying to prosecute the artist and the network instead of owning up to their own stupidity. The police now claim that they were “hoax” explosive devices. I don’t think you can claim they are hoax explosive devices unless they were intended to look like explosive devices, which merely a cursory look at any of them shows that they weren’t.

But it’s much easier to blame others than to admit that you were wrong:

“It is outrageous, in a post 9/11 world, that a company would use this type of marketing scheme,” Mayor Thomas Menino said. “I am prepared to take any and all legal action against Turner Broadcasting and its affiliates for any and all expenses incurred.”

The major media outlets have been fooled on two occasions: a) they haven’t exposed that confusing a major metropolitan police department is the equivalent of winning a dodgeball game against a team filled with the mentally retarded b) they got punked by the marketers of the night brights. The real besting done was by the perpetrators who insisted on talking about nothing but hair in the press conference proceeding their court appearance.

Two men accusing of placing electronic advertising devices around the city in a publicity stunt that stirred fears of terrorism and shut down parts of the city were released from jail Thursday, apparently amused with the prank.

Peter Berdovsky, 27, and Sean Stevens, 28, were released on $2,500 cash bond after each pleaded not guilty to placing a hoax device and disorderly conduct for a device found Wednesday at a subway station. They waved and smiled as they greeted people in court.

Outside, they met waiting reporters and television cameras and launched into an unusual discussion of hair styles of the 1970s.

“What we really want to talk about today — it’s kind of important to some people — it’s haircuts of the 1970s,” Berdovsky said.

While searching for my local Wizards, and thanks to the magic of BLOGS, I’ve finally, after all these years, been able to learn about the relationship between Harry Potter and Jews, coming from some weirdo who we can assume actually (GASP) believes in religion. And it’s not the cool one where you get presents when Jeebus flew to outer-space, either:

This item also started a couple of trains of thought rolling. First, there’s the issue of those of my co-religionists who object to reading the Harry Potter books from a halachik standpoint. I can respect – though I personally reject – the Jewish viewpoint that shuns all secular literature and culture across the board, from Harry Potter to Halloween, from Shakespeare to the Sopranos. While I personally disagree with this isolationist approach on many levels – intellectual, religious, and emotional – I can acknowledge that it is at least self-consistent. However, I believe those authorities who prohibit reading Harry Potter in particular, while allowing secular books in general, are severely misinformed.

First off, JK Rowling has missed out on a HUGE demographic. You know, the kind of people that have nothing better to do then take pride in make believe ideas about cultural and social identity? Also known as: since I do nothing in my life that makes me a worthwhile person, my fill-in-the-blank heritage can serve as a meaningful substitute — plus check out this hilarious monkey hat I wear to show it off!

The point is that all future novels, movies, and works of art need 5 black guys, a Jihadist, a Jihadist that raps, a white woman, a Chinaman(with a calculator and self-help book on Jewish wealth), with all of the preceding getting ready to lynch whatever Caucasian male has dutifully oppressed them. (By the way, if you’re one of the 50 people who read this blog and also happen to run ‘elie-expo’ — this is all in good humor and innocent bad taste, unless of course, your monkey cap blocks out all sense of sarcasm and you’re too busy burning anyone who criticizes Israel).