Go Mugabe, it’s yo birfday, and we don’t give a fuck bout yo negative GDP growth

You want to know what irony is? Irony is leading your country to the brink of complete financial and economic collapse, and then asking asking for donations for your birthday party. This is what Robert Mugabe, President of Zimbabwe, is doing. With inflation at a record high of 1,593% and agricultural production down 40%, Mugabe is asking the citizens to contribute $1.2 million for his 83rd BIRTHDAY PARTY. Yes, in a country where GDP is decreasing at 4.4 % per year, unemployment is at 80%, the average income is $2000, and public debt is 108.4% of GDP (as in they are indebted more than they earn as a nation), the President — who turned a prosperous country into the one we see now — wants to reward himself with a FUCKING BIRTHDAY PARTY. Mission Accomplished, toys!

In less important but equally dejecting news, “Many young Bostonians think city overreacted”. Oh, rly? Thankfully, anyone in my age group has been too busy overdosing on narcissism to notice our wonderful war on life or drinking their Iran Kool-Aid.

Good sex is not a rat race, don’t tell your kids their smart, and don’t forget: social class is the dividing line.