The Empire State Building in New York City is adorned with rainbow colors after the New York state senate approved a bill that legalized same-sex marriage in the third largest state in the United States.
Again he walked the lonely June walk. His sixth. But the first time he would rip off a drenched jersey not of the Cavaliers. He unclipped some luckless bracelet, slinked away from the TunnelVision camera, and into his first full summer as LeBron James: The Villain.
A sultry summer locked in the gym. Of endless jump shots and low post spin-moves. Months of watching his first name scroll along ESPN’s ticker as its own category, headlining his every passing thought and tweet. Months of couldas, wouldas, and What Should I Do Nows? Months to dwell on the mid-career crisis.
LeBron James is 26 years old. Half of his career remains. Legacy is still a six letter word tossed around by restless sportswriters. But LeBron James has played 627 NBA games. He is decidedly middle-aged in a young twenty-something’s game. He has an Olympiad on Kevin Durant and Derrick Rose. And just as many titles.
Year 8 was LeBron’s closest yet. But still two wins short. Still six rings short of MJ, five of Kobe. Even one ring short of Brian “The Janitor” Cardinal. And so LeBron James slips another year behind the MJ trajectory. Another year the crown sits a little heavier. Another blemish on the King’s name. In 2009, he walked off the court against Orlando. In 2010, there was Game 5 in Boston. And in 2011, The Fourth Quarter.
The Godfather of absurd rap, and perhaps the genre’s defining member, is R. Kelly. Already infamous for his micturition foibles (perhaps best portrayed in Dave Chappelle’s satirical masterpiece), R Kelly secured a place of unparalleled prominence with his 2005 release of “Trapped in the Closet”, R. Kelly’s 22 chapter Hip-Hopera, replete with philandering midgets hidden in kitchen cabinets.
Lesser known but still outstanding among Kelly’s hilarious repertoire are “Pregnant” and “Real Talk”, featured below for your enjoyment. The question has been posed of whether or not R. Kelly is trying to be funny. I think it’s evident that he knows what he’s doing, and is generous enough to produce videos that his audience can laugh at with him.
Remember when teachers, public employees, Planned Parenthood, NPR and PBS crashed the stock market, wiped out half of our 401Ks, took trillions in taxpayer funded bail outs, spilled oil in the Gulf of Mexico, gave themselves billions in bonuses, and paid no taxes? Yeah, me neither… Pass it on
