Middle America’s soul

It tastes like creationism and grits:

“Cool” people think country is hopelessly square. Country singers neither cuss like rappers nor grapple so boldly with “edgy” subjects. “Some messages are clearly not allowable [in country music], like ‘Fuck tha police’ or ‘I got 99 problems and a bitch ain’t one’,” writes Chris Willman in his excellent book “Rednecks and Bluenecks: The Politics of Country Music”. “But then there are messages that aren’t allowable in any other popular-music genre that flourish here, such as: I wish I’d been there when my mama died. I miss my husband in Iraq. Babies and old people rule. If I die, take care of my kids for me.”

Poles in bid to make Jesus Christ King of Poland

Contrary to popular belief, Jesus is NOT a Komodo Dragon. Not even close.

Today, the BBC brings us the tale of a group of Polish MPs, who have submitted a bill seeking to proclaim the one and only JC king of their (as the article notes) overwhelmingly Catholic country. Apparently, if the bill becomes law, Jesus will follow in the path of the Virgin Mary, who was declared honorary queen of Poland a staggering 350 years ago.

One might think that based on the Virgin Mary precedent, Jesus would be a sure shoe-in. Then again, this guy is the King of the Jews. Let’s leave it that way, huh?

WWPD?

Polish MPs bid to make Jesus king

Jesus is a Komodo Dragon

Jesus is doing it again, this time, as a Komodo Dragon (PS I heard the Virgin Mary stuck a snake up her puss — unsubstantiated rumor):

LONDON, England (Reuters) — Flora, a pregnant Komodo dragon living in a British zoo, is expecting eight babies in what scientists said on Wednesday could be a Christmas virgin birth.

Flora has never mated, or even mixed, with a male dragon, and fertilized all the eggs herself, a process culminating in parthenogenesis, or virgin birth. Other lizards do this, but scientists only recently found that Komodo dragons do too.

“Nobody in their wildest dreams expected this. But you have a female dragon on her own. She produces a clutch of eggs and those eggs turn out to be fertile. It is nature finding a way,” Kevin Buley of Chester Zoo in England said in an interview.

He said the incubating eggs could hatch around Christmas.

Kenyan Tourism Part 2

For those regular readers who may have noticed this burgeoning young (unofficial?) travel editor providing unparalleled insight into “off-the-road” destinations and situations, we bring another fine piece for those interested in following up on our earlier suggestion of Kenya as a suitable vacation-land.

In fact, it seems that there is a bustling underground economy, or bribery, as those stateside might think to call it. The author explains:

Swahili-speakers can take advantage of another ambiguous term. In Kenya a machine-gun-wielding guard suggested to a terrified Canadian aid worker: “Perhaps you would like to discuss this over tea?” The young Canadian was relieved: the difficulty could be resolved with some chai, which means both “tea” and “bribe”.

Well, readers, in search of underage sex workers, machine-gun-wielding overlords DO hold the key to your destiny… even if it sounds as simple as an oldfashioned tea-party.

The etiquette of Bribery

Important things to think about during Christmas

some things we all need to realize: Santa is a child molester, and he’ll finger you in the butthole if you are a naughty kid. I am NOT kidding.